blastedgoat

Synopsis:

Unfortunate Friends follows four girls from the same town that have each grown up with adversities ranging from substance abuse to mental illness. My name is Mandy and I experienced both of these situations as well as the stress of being “low income” and watching my best friends make choices that continue to keep them in the same situations they wanted to be liberated from. I will share my story and show similarities and differences between my own experience and the those of Amanda, Shantelle and Samantha. In the end I want people to see these hardships and how difficult it is to move on when it means possibly leaving your less fortunate friends behind.

Background:

Poverty is a growing issue and causes many problems for young people who are the most impoverished group in our society. Even in the best economic times impoverished communities must be aware of: substance abuse, malnutrition, inequalities in education as well as the potential for serious mental disorders. The current economic stress just makes these issues more common and drastic in already crumbling communities and add a burden to already struggling families. Facts and figures about teen pregnancy and drug and alcohol use may “scare” society momentarily into caring but the facts have always been there staring them in the face. Real stories are more compelling and relatable and call individuals and communities to act. It is easy to see myself and my friends in many of that statistics I have found but what is more helpful to understand is the psychological reasons for these behaviors. I will show how our responses to our parents’ shortcomings have affected us in our adult lives and how these issues are caused by social factors and what society can do to make better situations for young people.

Timothy M. Rivinus lays out common responses that children of substance abusing parents go through in “Children of Chemically Dependent Parents.” These children are much more likely to imitate their parent’s behavior as a way of dealing with emotional strain or painful events. Many feel they are “destined” to deal with reality the same way their parents did even if they are resentful of that parent. All four girls have used drugs and/or alcohol to cope with stresses and have maintained lasting addictions. Samantha is a good example of this because she was forced to work and be “responsible” from an early age and she stayed away from drugs, sex, and alcohol because above all else she feared becoming like her mother. Samantha is a smart and capable person but never learned her value as a person and was unable to stop herself once she gave into her inherited disposition to substances and bad relationships. She exhibits “workaholic” patterns and lacks the experience and model to develop meaningful relationships except with those who come from similar backgrounds or are themselves addicted or abusive. This explains why we became such close friends but as a general rule people who have lived through such hardships tend to shut down emotionally or numb themselves with the same behaviors they once abhorred.

In “Daughters of Madness,” Susan Nathiel provides insight into daughters who have mentally ill mothers. I will use this information to aid my memory of my own mother’s suicide attempts, hospitalizations and my responses to those events. Samantha’s mother is the only other parent who has been officially diagnosed with mental illness but the others show signs of the same conditions. A child’s response to a parent who is unfit due to substance abuse is not very different from one who has a mentally ill parent and often the two coincide with each other. I was able to be resilient due to my ability in school and interest in extra-curricular activities. For my friends who were devastated or overburdened in their home lives it is not surprising that they dropped out, turned to drugs, alcohol or sex or had children of their own at a young age. Nathiel talks about “psychological fallout” which includes substance abuse, dismissive attachments, too much focus on peer relationships, sexual acting out and attention seeking behaviors. My position is that when you are brought up in bad circumstances you will continue to live life as you know it to be until you find an outlet or someone who can guide you in a positive direction.

Rationale:

Growing up in a low income household prepared me for life as a broke college student, even in the midst of current concerns about our declining economy. I am passionate about this project because it comes directly from my experience and understanding of the world and there is no substitute for being there and being able to look back on it from a different perspective. Now I can see the disadvantages my friends and I had “growing up too soon” due to age-inappropriate stress as a result of living in poor neighborhoods with little supervision. We were forced to take care of ourselves as well as younger siblings even though we had a poor model for parents ourselves.

I was forced to assume a care giving role at thirteen when my parents divorced and my mother began showing signs of long a suppressed mental illness. I want to show people what my mother was before she got sick, how drastically she changed as a result of substances (illegal and prescribed) and how she came out of it all alive. My mother is supportive of my writing and filmmaking goals now and is proud that I was able to take my pain and produce something that will help others. Now that I am close to graduating college (the only one of the four girls to get this far) I still fear for my future and theirs. I am exhausted from years of balancing my professional and personal lives and feel now is the time to examine the past in order to move on. This documentary is a way for me to get over the past and reconnect with my three best friends, to find out what it was like for each of them and why my life turned out so differently. I also have reasons that speak to the larger population, to the fathers, siblings, and teachers of unfortunate young women in this country and all over the world; I hope they can take away something from our experiences that will better equip them to deal with the issues disadvantaged young women face at an alarming rate.

Amanda assumed a motherly role to her younger sisters and brother when her parents put her and her friends in charge. The whole family was ill cared for and all of the children had rotten teeth because their mother didn’t like the dentist. Amanda became a teen mother after dropping out of high school. She currently has two children and got married to their father. Shantelle also had three siblings, all boys. They lived with her mother who worked and drank a lot. Shantelle’s mom was “cool” with her oldest son “doing pot” as long as he was around her while he was doing it. Shantelle’s family moved a lot but we stayed friends until she started running with a rougher crowd. Shantelle’s mother has stopped using drugs and alcohol and it is my understanding that she goes to church and that Shantelle lives with her. Samantha was my best friend all through high school. She and her siblings were moved back and forth between their parents who both drank and worked full time jobs. Samantha had to get a job at sixteen and was responsible for paying for bills and items her parents or siblings wanted. She felt strongly against drugs, alcohol and sex until we graduated and she moved to a slightly bigger city to “get away” from her family. She often jokes about “being an alcoholic” because she fears she is becoming her mother.

Project Description:

This documentary will use interviews and re-enactments to piece together several similar stories into a larger narrative. It is a partially participatory piece so I will provide voice-over for the stories. I want to capture the environment and add elements such as period appropriate music that sets the tone of the film. I want the audience to physically see the places we grew up in order to compare our lives. I will shoot as much as possible at specific locations such as Amanda’s rundown, overcrowded, bug-infested house. I want to show that these girls could live in any town. Each story hits on similar themes but contains unique insight into the core issues of the film.

I will begin by introducing my house and story and explain how I became friends with each girl. An image I want to stress is that we walked to meet each other or walked to get where we were going. This story also depends largely on the relationships between mothers and daughters. I will juxtapose interviews of what the daughters think of their mothers as well as how their mothers view their daughters’ lives and futures and what affect (positive or negative) they have had on that future. I will provide a look into their current lives and how thay were and are negatively influenced by poverty, drugs, alcohol and mental illness. I want to show “where the parents were” while we were walking across town, watching younger brothers and sisters and making our own meals with limited resources. I will explore professional views of how children deal with stress and unfavorable environments and provide real life examples in myself and my friends.

I will show images that may be disturbing to people who exist outside the culture of drug addiction such as parents “getting high” around their children and not being able to provide the basic needs for them. I will emphasize that going to Amanda’s was something I loved and dreaded because she was my best friend but I hated the constant secondhand smoke and deplorable living conditions. I will contrast Amanda’s parents, my parents’ early “drug buddies” with my mom’s best friend when I was a little older. Shantelle and I became friends because our mothers did drugs together and while she wasn’t perfect she was much better at providing for her children. Shantelle and I spent a lot of time alone making up things from our imaginations. Shantelle could offer another perspective on Amanda’s family because we were mutual friends. Likewise Shantelle and Samantha knew each other and can provide another point of connection between our stories. I became friends with Samantha in middle school and we have been through a lot together since then.

The story will follow a mostly chronological timeline and each of the four sections will begin with a short “re-enactment,” which will set the stage for each location as well as the prevailing theme of that girl’s story:

Section 1: This section will show the exterior and interior of a dilapidated house. Two families live cramped in tiny bedrooms and the community spaces are overflowing with laundry and clutter. The house is infested with cockroaches and young children play unsupervised and talk about things they shouldn’t be aware of yet. The particular scene will involve Amanda, her younger cousin and myself. The conversation centers around the sexual experiences each girl has had. Amanda and her cousin are much more experienced due to sexual exposure and abuse within their family. Depending on the limitations of the young actresses which should be around the age of ten the scene may cut to an outdoors excursion between Amanda and her “boyfriend” having sex for the first time in a wooded area or the rape of Amanda’s cousin (still unnamed to protect identity) by her father who is in prison at the time of the conversation. Amanda’s story has a lot to do with growing up too soon and assuming adult roles. She is the only one of the four who has successfully had a child and started experimenting with sex at a young age. Her interviews will focus on her identity and self-esteem as girl who had a neglected appearance and little guidance in relationships.

Section 2: This scene is a combination of three consecutive “New Years Eve” celebrations that I had at Shantelle’s ever-changing homes. The emphasis will be on what kids talk about when their parents aren’t around. The tone is more humorous but still disturbing as there are five children left alone until well after midnight. The scene ends with Shantelle’s mother coming home to the kids listening to rock music. She has clearly been drinking all night and begins singing along to the radio while insisting that she isn’t “dwunk.” The song I would like to acquire for this section is “Can I Sit Next to You Girl” by ACDC. Shantelle’s story is focused on the effects of divorce on the family dynamic and with how daughters eventually emulate their mothers. I will interview her and her mother in order to get a better sense of their relationship before and after I spent a great deal of time with them. It is significant that many of my memories with Shantelle are of us walking to the store to take back cans to buy candy and making creative meals for ourselves such as “salt and pepper macaroni.” Shantelle’s mom raised four children with little help from her husband and turned to alcohol and drugs to aid in her pain and allowed her children to do the same as long as they were “good kids.”

Section 3: This section takes place in Samantha’s house and shows the closeness of our relationship as well as her family issues. I have chosen a time where Samantha had to work and I had been staying the whole weekend. Samantha comes home to find her mother letting her younger sister and I drink. Samantha gets angry at me for having fun while she has to work. We are about sixteen at this time and it is the first time I have been drunk. This scene shows how Samantha felt about “having fun” in high school and provides a stark contrast to her life now.

I will interview Samantha and get footage of her everyday life now. She drinks nearly every day and is promiscuous, something she was also very against when she was younger. I will try to open her up about her fears of the future and the inevitability of becoming “like her mother.” This section will bleed into the last section in the areas that we have in common. I will connect our mother’s madness by providing true scenes from our past and present realities.

Section 4: My scene begins with a birthday card that my mother didn’t have time to sign before she was admitted to MHI (Mental Health Institute) when I turned thirteen. I will use the re-enactment to show myself going to see her for the first time with my Grandmother and Aunt. I will reflect on everything I had been through and what I had seen my friends go through to show the fear I had about completely losing my mother. The section will also deal with the similarities and differences between my experience and my friends’ experiences. All of our stories are tied together through my experience so the end will serve as a way to step back from these stories to make sense of the women we have become. As the young actress playing me sees the institution for the first time images of things that will happen in her future will be edited into the peaceful scenery.

I will show a few moments of a quiet meeting with a mother who is drugged with bandages on her wrist. I will show her running away after discovering drugs in the bathroom. I will show her (growing up) visiting her mother across many different tables with her mother in varying stages of health. I will show one of the most personal moments in my life, the moment I realized my mother was addicted to Meth and didn’t want me when I came to visit in the hospital and only wanted what I was supposed to bring her. The last image of my mother is the one people see now, scarred, crippled yet smiling. The film will end with “me” walking out of the hospital with a voice-over explaining “it wouldn’t be the last time I walked out of the hospital after seeing my mother, and that I couldn’t be sure that she even knew I was there but I did know that my life had changed and things would never be the same again.”

Key Personnel: Mandy Fauser: Writer, Director, Participant, Editor.
Mandy has worked as a crew member on one short film but also writes, stars in and edits short pieces that are posted online. She also worked on a documentary about “Relay for Life.” She is a writer of poetry and is also interested in autobiographical fiction, a genre which she hopes will gain in popularity when her current projects, including a play and several short stories are published. Mandy enjoys acting and technical work on theatrical shows and has been on the cast and crew of several Waterloo Community Playhouse productions, a Black Hawk Children’s Theatre production as well as plays throughout high school.

Timeline:

Pre-Production: May 1- May 31
Pre-interviews
Obtaining materials: letters, pictures, home videos, journals
Script development
Re-enactments casting and rehearsal
Securing permissions for use of locations and music
Obtain equipment and crew
Establish final shooting schedule and budget

Production: June 1- Aug 31
Interviews with Amanda, Shantelle and Samantha and myself
Interviews with family members
Shooting of actual locations
Shooting of re-enactment pieces

Post-Production: Sep 1- Nov 1
Editing– Transcribing, rough & final cuts
Publicity, Marketing, and Distribution (Release date: October 22, 2009)
Submit Unfortunate Friends to film festivals including but not limited to:
Chicago International Children’s Film Festival (October)
Columbus International Film & Video Festival (November)
Denver Film Festival (November)
Tallgrass Film Festival (October)
Vancouver International Film Festival (October)