The American Dream: Bed Bug Killers or Within A Mouse’s Click of Desire?

I thought you would enjoy reading this spam post from “Bed Bug Killer” because for some reason David Thier has a cult following of pest eradicators… who knew?

Bed Bug Killer
killbedbug@rocketmail.com
2011/07/15 at 3:34 am

It is great that we all have our freedom of expression and you can belt out anything that you need to release… be it anger joy or frustration… About your story of Mr, David Thier, Money is not everything and if it is the reason he does things, then he had gained less and lost more… I love reading Harry Potter books and no offense meant to the producers and movie makers, i felt that the movie has deleted some parts which I dont think that would make justice for the book. Jo had really been a great writer describing and narrating everything, that even without the movie, she had taken me to a magical place. But everyone is entitled to their own opinion and someone else could find watching a movie more educational rather than reading a book.

If what you said about Mr. David was true, then don’t you think that you just had given him what he wanted to happen? which is to have a lot of people see him and click his site? And with you putting a link to his posts, just make his objective realized. Which makes me think if you were Mr. David Thier pretending to be someone else so just to make a fuss about his blog and send links to his sites.

Also, i am sorry but i dont think that it is appropriate to make your dislike to Mr. David Thier, a dislike for Americans. David Thier and your issue is an issue between the two of you and not an issue between British and Americans. I wish you joy and happiness. Have a nice day!

This was by far the single most entertaining bit of spam I have received thus far after three years of blogging! I have had some funny sex spam, odd links and names and I even make SPAM POETRY out of some of the better ones… the ones that are an endless list of “keywords” it just makes the perfect starting point for a “found poem”. This seemed somehow smarter than most spam and though it was idiotic it still made me smile :)

I gave my readers the link (as well as posting the most ludicrous examples of his work within my story for context… which ended up being nearly the entire article!) I love that the bot cleverly alludes to the fact that I am, in fact, Mr. David Thier myself! I take the time to write a much more elaborate post that almost no one reads in order to lead people to my actual story, the one I spent several hours bashing a few days ago. BRILLIANT!

“Which makes me think if you were Mr. David Thier pretending to be someone else so just to make a fuss about his blog and send links to his sites.”

If I was David Thier, I would probably take this bots advice… maybe that is why Thier’s article had so many negative comments, he was just logging into different accounts seemingly as different people from around the world and picking holes in his own badly made argument. EVEN MORE BRILLIANT!

I think I will start doing that and see if my traffic increases! I should just post this link on every single blog post I come across just to spread the news of what a bad writer, I, David Thier am… oh wait, I’M NOT REALLY DAVID THIER! Why? I dunno, look at my blog guy… I’ve been doing this since 2008. Clearly though, I am really just a crappy freelance writer that pretends to be a young Midwestern female blogger, oh my! I could make an Inception joke but why? It would be too easy, something David Thier would sink to, I’m sure. I bet I am really confusing the bots now… Am I Thier or and I just not there at all? You decide and let either of us know in the comments!

I felt people should understand his bad points and read his horrid writing for themselves. I brought money into the equation as a comparison between a writer who probably got paid a lot and lives off of ad revenue and myself, a recently unemployed college graduate who writes for fun and to keep her skills sharp (or learn to learn new skills) to get an actual paying job. As an English major I was taught how to cite my sources and I wanted my readers to trust that I had done my research before I jumped into a story merely to generate “hits”. I am saddened that far more people will see his story and that mine had more genuine content but that is the nature of the writing industry.

Look at this blog, do you want to know where most of my hits come from? They come from spam and bots like this one I’ve quoted above. So few people are out there looking for informative pieces and far more drool over tabloids, celebrity news and teenagers singing about the days of the week, vomiting glitter or birthing themselves in space.

There seems to be little room in this big world of blogging and internet videos for a shy twenty-something from the Midwest. However, I keep writing and taking pictures and videos everyday. I post them here so I can keep myself organized and I check out those few “Freshly Pressed” daily. Not just to see if my words had miraculously made it to the top of over a million words posted that day but to open my mind to what my fellow Pressers have to say. I find their comments more intelligent (perhaps not as intelligent as if I am on say, an NPR story) but they are certainly well above the bar when considering YouTube comments for Rebecca Black. There are people who cook or take pictures or even some who write tech posts. The range is impressive and the quality is usually up to snuff. I get a little huffy when I see a post a four year old could have written that simply had a good picture or just a lucky choice of keywords but overall I feel most of the FP peeps are worth checking out.

I have always said I didn’t want this to happen to me. I should amend that to say that I hope it doesn’t happen for a post that doesn’t deserve it. I have made it my goal to only post quality things here but in a rush it can be difficult. I took quite a bit of time reading and responding to Mr. Thier’s article because it had a lot of Potter fans talking (if not yelling) at their computer screens!

In order to be a great writer, or in my case, at least a readable writer you have to get your sentences in form, your thoughts in order and your points have to have a point. I feel this is lacking when I go to “news” blogs and can find ten typos in a tiny article and the person writing the thing is barely mentioned or payed attention to. They don’t want you to know who is writing because they are essentially paying monkeys to write the news. It would probably be more entertaining and humane if they did. What they really do is make crappy stories about what they think people will click on.

The internet is no longer a place for the exchange of ideas (and files) but rather another big brother trying to stick his nose in your friends list, your online banking account and your clicking history. This big brother wants you to buy things to keep our failing economy alive and at the same time they want to scare you into believing some criminal will steal your identity and blow up whatever building you happen to be standing in. The evening news reports only the bad news and makes some people so paranoid they start believing the lies. Don’t believe me? Talk to anyone who watches Fox News (and not for entertainment purposes).

The terrorists are the companies who sell you the products and make you “need” the debit cards, big houses, ridiculous cars and endless iPods that you seek so desperately to protect. You insure your car, your house, your health and evn your life but in the end you lose it all and those bastards go laughing all the way to the bank.

And then a bot posts something like this on the post you took so long to carefully word, proofread and publish for the entire world to see. Instead some asshole selling bug spray sends a clearly targeted spam ad at you and you just laugh to yourself. It doesn’t matter if only bots are reading your views on the world because soon that’s all there’s gunna be. No flesh and blood readers, only ipads, kindles and whatever fix they come up with for the tech junkie next.

Ask yourself if you want some guy you know nothing about telling you how a book you’ve loved for years doesn’t hold its own against the film that was made directly from it? Not to mention that this man has a track record of writing stories that piss fans of said phenomena off. I used his American vs. British Office review in my post and the bot picked up on this and says my dislike for David Thier is a dislike for Americans. I am an American! Not to say that I don’t dislike most of them. At least the ones who write for news publications and clearly don’t understand how to write or the stories they attempt to cover. This country needs to stop watching sluts on television and gawking at fake celebrity scandals at the supermarket and look around.

Look at the twelve year old girl with a tan, smart phone and tube top and figure out why she is a complete idiot with no self esteem. Then ask why that same girl will probably get knocked up by some loser and try to abort it or become an idolized “Teen Mom”. That is what these young people see in our culture and they think it is tolerated, accepted and cool. It should be none of the three. We need to educate kids and not let religious fanatics let them go blindly into a world full of STD’s, unwanted pregnancies, failing job markets and record breaking debts. Stop using rhetoric to sell votes and tell me what you really think.

Look at me. I am twenty-five, unemployed, college educated, well-trained in food and library service, was an active volunteer, the daughter of drug addicts and alcoholics, a child of poverty who continues into an adulthood of debt and doubt. Still I will write. That is what I was taught and it is what I love to do. You don’t give up, work hard and someday you will reach the top. That is the most hurtful aspect of the American Dream, that everyone has to believe in it for a small few to achieve it.

Without little old poor me the government would have no one to blame or exploit. It might sound terrible but I feel lucky to be a poor white female. I have a slightly better chance at getting out of the poor house than my black and brown friends. Coming from a racially diverse town and moving to the next town over that is completely lacking in any diversity whatsoever, I can tell you that racism is alive and thriving in our politically correct climate. I grew up having friends from nearly every ethnicity and social class singing songs about the “melting pot” of America. I even had a duet with a black boy named Landon in the school music concert.

I still remember some of those song lyrics from elementary school choir:

“Our country is a melting pot from many different places…
Europe, Asia or Africa, just to name a few,
making this a melting pot for me and you!”

“U N’ I begin the United States,
U N’ I my friends are our country’s greats.
U N’ I good folks give this land its name,
yes, we all contribute to our county’s fame.
U N’ I can be what we want to be,
cuz we all are livin’ in a land that’s free.”

I will never stop telling Americans and anyone in the world that can read what I’m saying and understand it how I feel. The more you care about real people with opinions, emotions and experiences the less likely you will be to boil them down into categories and sell them harmful products for profit.

Before you get mad at anything I’ve written above please consider that I actually have a sense of humor so if you don’t I consider you develop one before hitting “send” on that nasty, un-Christianlike comment you were about to spew on behalf of that cocksucker, David Thier.

Take my bots’ advice: everyone is entitled to their own opinion and someone else could find watching a movie more educational rather than reading a book. Wait, that was terrible advice! I think if one decides to pursue an educational activity that they most definitely do pull out a book and turn the DVD player off! Unless, of course, you are reading a Seventeen Magazine and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind pops on, then I feel you would be more enriched as a human being to take your time viewing the latter rather than looking at page after page of pimple-less, glossy, twenty-somethings posing as teenagers.

Michel Gondry directs an intriguing visual story about the meaning of memory, dreams and experiences and all teen publications do is sell expensive, unnecessary and at times harmful pharmaceuticals to your little girls and tell them how to please your little boys. Then, the church makes the school not tell your boys and girls to put on a ‘raincoat’ when they start playing around and out pops your caffeine addicted grandchild who is promptly passed off to television, public school and Ritalin. The American Scheme continues! God bless America!

As I have always maintained: we live in America, land of the fee, home of the slave. I wish you joy and happiness. Have a nice day!

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2 thoughts on “The American Dream: Bed Bug Killers or Within A Mouse’s Click of Desire?

  1. Pingback: Deliver Me to Hogwarts « blastedgoat

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